I think people sometimes under estimate the value of inner peace. I have seen so many people; men and women grow through break ups, family problems, work issues, friend problems, spiritual, death and just be completely drained from whatever ordeal they went through. Remember that inner peace is your foundation in life and is truly valuable as all your logical decisions come from that inner peace. Like they say about various products, yet this is about your mind-it’s PRICELESS!
I remember when I went through a divorce some 8 years ago, I was just so happy to be over and done with it. I use to say “boring is good”. Perhaps thats hard to fathom that anyone would wish for a boring life, yet when you go through an emotionally challenging time period in your life, its easy to think and want, really. Yes there’s a lot of excitement in life, so choose it wisely, so there are no real headaches the next day, you know, or like I say crap to clean up.
My ex-husband and I weren’t really as good of a match as I had first thought. Once we lived together he turned out to be a really different person. He would complain about just everything. He was a perfect human being on the outside, yet a complete mess on the inside. So my advice to all of you men and women, do your homework, really get to know the person when your dating, their families, friends and ask those hard to ask questions. I was in my 20’s at the time and I did what most 20 somethings do and say, “I cant ask those questions”. Its not whether you can or whether you should or not– YOU MUST, especially if you want to get serious with this person. It will be the only way you can possibly figure out if this is just dating fun or marriage material. Trust me, theres nothing worst than getting blindsided, like I did. Do Not let it happen to you.
I spent 3 years in the relationship and probably 3-5 years getting over it. So, next time you date someone who doesn’t quite fit you, ask yourself do you have 8 + years to throw away?
No one will be everything to you, yet I do believe both must see eye to eye on core values such as; spirituality/religion, finances, children, family, temperaments, living arrangements, expectations, etc. Or be able to agree on the differences you have.
I will include different dating tests at some later time.
Heres the 1st one:
write your top 10 core values then rate them between 1-10.
add them up and ask yourself is this good enough for you?
Heres my example:
list rate 1-10
2. respect 8
3. Job 9
4. Family values 9
5. wants children 7
41/50 score: B
Then total the score.
You can the idea, depending on how long you want to make this list. I suggest no more than 15.
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